The referee mentality 220810
Everyone recognises the man in the center of a football pitch who wears a different uniform from everyone else and seems to try and avoid touching the ball at all times. All the other men on the field kick the ball at will but this particular one is more concerned about something completely different from playing the ball.
If a player dribbles past five players this man remains quiet and follows the proceedings silently. If, however, he tries to dribble past the sixth and accidentally handles the ball with his hand, the once unruffled man blows his whistle at highest volume to make sure no one misses what he is trying to say. It does not matter how many good things a player does on the pitch, this man does not seem to notice. A minor infringement of the rules makes him excited, however. All the time he is looking for mistakes. Let me introduce you to the man they call the referee.
To make sure the job of seeing mistakes more effective and efficient, the referee has two assistants who run along the touch line to make sure no mistake goes unnoticed. If one of the assistants notices something wrong, he waves his flags frantically and excitedly so that the man at the centre sees. You may be mistaken to think that he has discovered the cure for AIDS. No mistake goes unnoticed since these three are assisted by a fourth man who watches the game from a television screen so that anything that happens off the ball can be noticed. As a result of the determined effort of these four, every mistake that happens on the field is detected without fail.
The referee keeps a book in his pocket where he records every mistake that takes place. If one player commits a mistake that the referee thinks is very big, he takes a yellow card from his pocket and makes sure that the offending player notices he is not happy with such behavior. If the same player makes another serious offence in the same game, the referee sends the player off the field after showing him a ed card. In as much as he seems to enjoy watching the players making mistakes, it appears he has no tolerance for those who continually make mistakes. I take it he gets tired of looking for mistakes as time goes on because he rarely dishes out these cards at the beginning of the game.
I do not know what the referee does with the record of the offences at the end of the game but I take it if he officiate another game that involves one of these teams he may remember some of the offenders and book them early. Why else would he keep such a record?
It is unfortunate that there are some people who have the same mentality as the referee in real life No matter how many good things you do they do not seem to notice. They go around with a whistle waiting to blow any time you make a mistake. You can spend the whole year doing good things but they do not seem to care. You realise they are there every time you make a mistake because the noise of their whistle is so loud that you cannot miss it.
These whistle blowing critics have perfected their art so that they have used support from other like minded people to assist them so that everything you do is scrutinised. If you make a mistake there is always one member of the team who notices and alerts the others. As a result all the mistakes made get the attention they deserve.
If you make a mistake ten years down the line, these referees remember that it is not the first mistake and because they have an efficient recording system they remember the date on which the last offence was committed. They do not only remember the offence committed but they punish you double for both offences even if you have forgotten that you committed such an offence in the past. No matter how many good things you do, they do not cancel the single bad thing that you did a long time ago. That is why a hat-trick hero can receive marching orders from a game in which he is the man of the match.
The problem is that the referee is always anxious since he is trying to notice all mistakes such that as long as the game is in progress he cannot rest. He is so preoccupied with noticing mistakes he cannot enjoy his life. The same happens to those who give themselves a referee’s job in real life. They cannot enjoy themselves at all because they are worried about making sure they do not miss a mistake made.
The referee mentality is something that you can catch easily if you live with critical people. There is no reward, however, for those who engage in this profession. All they get is frustration because as long as they are looking for mistakes they will find them. Do not be one of those who have the referee mentality. Seek for good things in all people and you will find them. Be a spectator instead. The spectators cheer those who do a good job on the pitch. There is no harm in being a cheerleader in the lives of those who are around you. They will appreciate you for the support you give them. If someone asks for your forgiveness, forgive them and try to forget. Do not bring past issues up when the individual makes another mistake. That way those you love keep having clean sheets on which to start. Every one of us makes mistakes and I am sure no one wants to be reminded of their flaws every time. Leave the referee to do what he is paid to do but do not learn from him so as to implement his profession in everyday life.
